Saturday, August 22, 2015

Deskgram

I decided to add instagram to the long list of stuff I use on the internet.  Had to borrow my sister's cracked-screen phone to do it because, get this - while you can ogle nice photos on laptop/web instagram, you can't get an account that way.
Ouh-kay.
So I have an account.  Today I decided to add a fabulous photo.  Asked google how, since instagram wouldn't let me - my 'membership' means I can comment and like (heart), that's it.  Found out about BlueStacks App Player in a comments section of a how-to article.  The program works by creating a false phone environment on your regular computer so that you can run phone apps, including Instagram.

In the middle of installing that, I found another option in the same comments section - Deskgram.
It's the more intuitive answer - I just want to bloody post a picture and don't really need all the firepower offered by the general app player.  I don't want the ability to also use the app stores to get any app in the world or whatever.
Deskgram also appeals to my need to not 'learn' Android.  I mean, I just want to post a bloody picture.

I never learned to navigate an Apple Mac, or iPhone iPod iPad.  I never learned the jumpy-screen Windows-after-Windows7 experiments.  I think it was called Vista or something?  Windows, then Vista.  View through the window.  Seriously. 
Thankfully Windows 10 is bringing the 'Start button' back.  Like seriously, you need to figure out how I'm using the computer and match that, or wait till I get round to testing your new UI idea pro bono.
It costs quite a bit of mindspace to learn a new interface like this phone thing with its scrolling swiping, autocorrect, and all that jazz.  Even if the new interface is pretty.  Very pretty.  It's worth downloading BlueStacks just to see this prettiness: for example, instead of the status bar while you wait for your download (2.2% completed etc) you get a slideshow of gorgeous screenshots of the games (Angry Birds and such) you'll soon have access to.  Time flies while you're having such fun.

But now I'm going to uninstall bluestacks.  The application required my google password.  Which makes me feel insecure.  That's like, really private information.  Like, would you 69 on a blind date?  Deskgram only needs my instagram password.  That's a handshake - I'd share that with anybody.
http://www.bbc.com/travel/story/20150625-where-algebra-was-invented
Now let me go and add this picture, abeg. - @tosinbird
There are lots of other things to gripe about, but I'd better pace myself :)  :D
Like, think: 
How did phones become flat - whose idea was that?  So we evolved from 3D serpentine to rectangular blocks?  I find myself wishing for product design to take over that space.

And how many phone-makers put the typewriter-keyboard on the screen. Ouh-kay, I guess that works for some people.  I like the classic/physical keypad a la Blackberry, so I can work. 

I do love the fact that they now have colours.  Loved that from the minute I saw it, Nokia-now-Microsoft.

Oh, and how useless are the banks in this country?  Reliably useless.  I constantly forget that.
  
Advertisement: Read my books. ###Three Sisters, novel #1 here###

Friday, August 21, 2015

everybody's screaming Compton

...Stick a flag in my city - everybody screaming Compton - I should pro'bly run for mayor when I'm done, to be honest...
- Kendrick Lamar (King Kunta)

Veteran musician Dr. Dre has just released a music album and movie about that scary 'hood.
Compton, where Yetunde, big sister of Venus and Serena Williams was killed in a mindless drive-by shooting.
I remember when my little sisters wanted to go out to Compton for a New Year's party.  Or was it Carson?  They'll remember it as Fun December 2004.  Anyway, no, anywhere but there, sweeties.  Y'all 'bout to give me a heart attack :) so I shepherded them to a party in the whiter, bourgie-r, safer hillside town of Altadena.

Maybe I'll see the Straight Outta Compton film at some point, and try out the music too, but meanwhile here's the effect these hip-hoppers have had on media interest in "Compton"
https://www.google.com/trends/explore#q=compton%2C%20Nigeria%2C%20Africa&cmpt=q&tz=Etc%2FGMT-1
Google Trends: Compton (in blue) is ten times more popular than, basically, ever
For comparison, at the top (yellow) is Africa and in red is Nigeria, both of which spike in popularity for football and only for football - L and M coincide with the 2010 World Cup hosted by South Africa, while G marks the 2014 World Cup where Nigeria almost made the quarterfinals.
Right now, Compton (population ~100,000) is a bigger deal than Lagos (population > 20 million) and even Nigeria, and all because of a movie.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compton,_California
Wikipedia: Compton is youthful 'working-class' and black, but has produced great musicians

There's a lesson here: it's so easy to build a city.  Keywords: Lekki.  Ikeja.  Oregun.  dot-biz.  Chambers of Commerce.  I'm just saying, let's BE the local government we want to see. 

Advertisement: Read Three Sisters, my novel #1 here ##

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Dance Party: Timbuctu Nights

Black Beat Noir Negro Alf Laila Leggo!


Tonight by Bigiano


Ewele by ShowDemCamp (SDC)


Crazy by Seyi Shay (ft Wizkid)

Advertisement: Read my books.

Friday, July 03, 2015

over-sharing highlights from one year ago

Tomorrow is July 4th, which means that one year ago we were in Barcelona for little sister K's wedding.
It was just this morning I finally "created" a virtual museum post on REALbubbler, so now, excited about the coincidence, I checked my little book and found that woah, indeed, on Day 6 of that trip, July 3rd, in the morning, among other things I'd hung out for hours at the Catalonia History Museum.  Yep, the one I lovingly nicknamed The Museo Nacionale de Fake Shit.  The one that inspired me more than anything else I saw in that town - I said, wow, these people make something out of nothing, every time, while losers make excuses.  You know how in developing (or non-developing) countries, it's always blah blah due to the issues of inadequate this and non-availability of that and low funding and lack of capital...  Now, these people made a museum with very few valuable artifacts; most of the exhibits were replicas or reproductions of the originals.  Kudos to the can-do, get-it-done spirit.  And I came back home and explored the idea of a virtual museum and found a few good examples.

If this was an anonymous blog, here would be more excitement.  (I'll try not to edit too much.)  It is incredible how much I saw and did in just seven days, I mean, I'm incredible, lol.  If I had a decent camera, I'd just photograph the short pages of my notes to show you.  Am I the only person left who doesn't carry a cracked-screen phone complete with video camera and Candy Crush?

Ok, here's the summary page at the end of my 10 pages of notes from the trip:
Highlights
  You know I loved a boy.
  My father loved our date.
  The wedding was lovely.
  The croquette at the wedding reception.
  The kiss that sanctified air.

Lessons
  I speak beginner to intermediate Spanish.  Better than I thought.  
  You can charge admission to a museum of fake shit.  Maybe even an online museum.

Wow, so much to explain all at once.  Where do I start?  No, I don't even remember what sanctifying air means, but it must have been really something :)  That was Day 3.  By Day 4, I'd been dumped but didn't know it until Day 5 or 6 when I'd been double or triple-dumped.  Day 7, in the final hours, I got my boy back yaaaay, isn't it wonderful when love wins?  We fled to his apartment for a quick chat during his 15-minute lunch break (work work work), the way we talked it technically didn't count [Clinton, 1998] because ehhn, time was short and he was Indian so I didn't see the point, but he was super happy and I was heart-happy and free to skip off to meet my peeps and duck into a bookstore and meet a gorgeous book guy that you already know and do lunch with my peeps and get to the airport.

I don't know what the croquettes were made of, but yum.  That was Day 1, the wedding.  Same day as checking out the local park, big lunch, grabbing something to wear because luggage gone.  Loool because my stylish sisters' luggage gone too, so they couldn't upstage the bride.  Wedding after-party and after-after-party, but I'm a human being after all, I was tired.

I'd actually got food-poisoning on Day 0 and emptied my whole gut in the plumbing at the connecting airport (practiced my Arabic with the cleaner lady who wanted baksheesh, oh dear, just like Nigeria) and hung out at night with the groom's crew from Bilbao right after, so I don't know where all the energy came from.  Guess when you don't have too much money lying about and someone gets you a trip to wherever - thanks mama - you get in there and rock the hell out of it :) 

Day 2, Sunday, I walked throughout Barcelona.  Discovering downtown is like what I was born to do.  In my notebook, I listed: Poblenou/Diagonal, past Torre Agbar and Glories Mall and Design museum, up by Sagrada Familia and Casa Mila (La Pedrera) and Casa Batlo and great buildings with steel balustrade on intricate facades, the shops, outdoor dining, and street musicians on Passeig del Gracia, El Corte Ingles to change money ( $ gift from uncle ) and retrieve my red scarf forgotten yesterday, and down La Rambla.  Don't forget Marilyn Monroe and the erotic museum. S wanted to see my chest, well, to determine my shirt size. Home by 11pm.

By Day 3 I was fit to work as a tour guide; fortunately, my father was willing to hang out with me, so I got to put my skill to use :)  I put my high-heels on thinking it would be some mild walking, then we took public transportation everywhere, but lots of hiking - the park near the hotel, the zoo - sea lion show yippee, then Parc Guell, food and the Nigeria-France world cup match, then Camp Nou closing time.  Then it was night and I sent papa to bed while I went to see flamenco and fall for a local (S from Day 2) and sanctify the air.

Day 5 my feet were finished, so I did nothing but rest and watch TV, but Day 4, I took a different cut across the town.  An hour or two with my mother and lovely sister but we split up because I'd already seen the mall a couple of times - love you very dearly but no more El Corte Ingles for me, so now I did Barri Gotic, a church, the ateliers, got lost and ended up in a sort of rough area and Parc de la Ciutadella, walked the marina still lost, rushed dinner, late to the opera, waited for loverboy who of course had made a point of going out to the W hotel without me because he's an evil Las Ramblas dude lol, so instead I talked to a drunk likely minor drug dealer dude who explained the ecology of Las Ramblas nightlife - the prostitutes, the Nigerians, the tough guys, the whole scam repeating night after night.  That day was the taxi union strike (against Uber) so I had to walk/bus home very late.  Was thinking to go off to Paris for Day 5 but no money, no feet...I let everybody else have the fun for a change :)

Day 6, July 3rd, I had money again and dad said I had to buy stuff so I complied during my walk down to the center of town.  Then as you know, I went to that national history museum.  I didn't mean to go there, I'd thought this was the famed Catalonia Art Museum, was so sure I was an expert in Barcelona, all I needed to do was walk past the marina and the beach.  So it was the wrong place, but it was the right place after all.
Afterwards I asked a local what I should do next because I'd already done everything, so I spent the afternoon at Laberinto d'Horta on the outskirts of town, then did some Gaudi (Casa Mila), went late to my sister's show at fashion week, hung out at this amazing musical instrument shop, and then as my little book has it "Unbelievable: ST stood me up again!  ...I waited 2 hrs.  Got drunk on half a glass of Sangria.  Couldn't eat my dinner."

Day 7: First, to hospital with K (sister) and mum.  Then to La Rambla to think, eat a perfect sorbet (my third - same flavour, same shop) and make up with my beautiful.  It worked.  (...camera fades...) Later, on the flight back, I was in dreamland because (...ok, this is too sappy...) 

Advertisement:  ###Three Sisters, my novel #1 here###

PS
Luggage returned Day 2 or 3.
Reason number three that I didn't go to Paris on Day 5?  ST.  As in, heartbreak.  
I forgot about ST all these months :0

I was also going to write about the future of work - telecommuting (I'm about to try a full telecommute gig) and virtual workplaces (virtual reality, immersion in any place you choose).  Well, now I have.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramon_Casas_and_Pere_Romeu_on_a_Tandem
What I would have seen at the other museum

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Dance Party - the Arab Megahits edition


Amr Diab's Habibi ya Nour El Ain


Nancy Ajram's Ah W Noss


Have there been any dance-y songs bigger?

Advertisement: Read my books.
Give ###Three Sisters, my novel #1 here###